Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Back from the Wilderness or Belated Update

I am here to announce that the Great Theatre Rebellion of 2014 has finally been put down… kind of. Yes, it’s true. I have seen a hell of a lot of theatre this year - over one hundred productions. I have also reviewed, well, ahem, over one hundred productions. While I enjoy this theatrical diversion I’ve hit the ‘rookie wall’ and can’t sustain the cracking pace. 

Plus I have to, you know, write.

So what’s been happening on that front, Richard?

Thank you for asking fictional & anonymous blog reader.

The sixth draft of the feature script Turbulence has been coming along… slowly. Too slowly but now the stage production obsession is in remission it’s something I’ll be returning to with a vengeance. In related news my director is moving back to Melbourne. I half suspect it’s in protest of my glacial writing ways but apparently it has more to do with the Carlton Football Club and the kind of Victorian lifestyle one doesn’t find in WA. Thank goodness for Skype.

The web series Boondock Alley now has a facebook page and even a website. Not bad for something ‘still in development’ which I believe is the euphemistic term for ‘ain’t nuthin’ been shot yet’. The search for a producer has been ongoing with lots of people “loving the concept”, asking for scripts then never being heard from again. This leads me to a few possible conclusions – the scripts are so fucking awful as to induce the sort of demise one might find in The Ring. You know, after reading the script, your mobile rings and a dodgy ADR track whispers, “seven days”. The prospective producer then loses all possible means of communication in some catastrophic meltdown thus rendering them helpless. Except to post pictures of cats and selfies on various social media platforms. It’s a curious phenomenon! Other conclusions have been self-censored for fear of causing offence.

However, there was a meeting Saturday past at some ungodly hour in the morning as insisted by a complete moron (namely me) where we tried something a little different. A face to face pitch then the physical handing of the Bible and Pilot script to two gentlemen who seemed switched on with strong credentials. One of my actor/producer colleagues received a call 7am Monday morning to say they loved it and were “in”. The way to avoid The Ring style curse is clearly not to email the script – there’s always a loophole in those horror stories! This could be a promising development with talk of a January shoot… let’s see how things progress.

On the very same day, a businessman I met at a producing course who subsequently pitched me a feature film idea on the rooftop of a boutique bar in the city as we celebrated the ending of said course… man, this is a loooooong sentence… *deep breath*… sent me a whole lot of material to read with a view to see if it could be turned into a script. This is after a weird conversation about ISIS, ebola and filmmaking. Only two of those things threaten to destroy the fabric of civilisation as we know it… though there are times it could be all three if someone makes me sit through movies like Godzilla again. 

Oh, hey! Did I mention? I did a producing course!!!! So frustrated with the inability to get short film scripts and the web series made I decided to pretty much splash out on an FTI course in sheer desperation. Six times three hour sessions conducted by Tenille Kennedy who I have known for a while and now have an even greater appreciation for her producing skills. I’m not sure it’s what I really want to do and Tenille has a wealth of experience and knowledge that would take me a long time to acquire. I want someone like her to produce my scripts not try and be her. But it certainly gave me some great insights from a different perspective and oh, hey, did I mention the networking/pitching over drinks thing?

That’s pretty much it other than to say it’s been a strangely film orientated few days with the other director I have developed projects with contacting me out of the blue today and we had a coffee and chat. Maybe it’s all a sign for me to pull my proverbial out and get on with the Turbulence draft… 

PS Australia Post - when someone sends you a certificate in the mail and the envelope says "Please don't bend" it actually means Please don't fucking turn it into an origami swan to get it into the letterbox!

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